A Giant Leap of Faith

So, I titled this blog "A Giant Leap of Faith"  but in all reality each breathe we breath, each step we take, every word we speak, each car we drive/ride in is all a leap of faith.  Sometimes, we forget these day in and day out obstacles that we conquer each and every day without blinking an eye.  Well, and then there are the "toughies"...the ones we say extra little prayers about and ask others to pray for us because we do not know what the actual outcome will be we just know it is the right thing to do.

And, this leads to my next blog.  Juan and I have decided to have me stay home for the remainder of the school year.  This is so hard for me to grasp how it will all work out.  How can I stay home with our little boy and still be able to make everything happen?  We have always been a two income household and at time struggle to get by.  How is this going to work?  What will the parents of the students in my class think?  I do not want to let them down.  Once again, I am receiving "the peace that passes all understanding!"  I do not know how it will work but it will.  It is what is best for our little guy.  This is only temporary.  I will return to work in August when the new school year begins.

Lucas is taking two types of medication one is a water pill to reduce the fluid on his lungs and then a high blood pressure medication.  These two medications need to be given 2-3 times a day.  Along with these two medications they may lower his potassium levels he may need a third.  We thought were headed in the right direction as far as his weight gain but we aren't.  He has been falling so he has appointments for weight checks a couple times a week to make sure he is gaining weight.  He is gaining weight he is just not gaining a large enough amount so we have been needing to document his intake and add formula to his breast milk to give him more calories.  Remember it is as if he is running a marathon every minute of the day, his heart does not rest while sleeping like our it is constantly pumping at the same rapid speed.  If these changes to his feedings to not help him gain weight he will need to get a feeding tube.  We really do not want this to happen, so Mama is giving 110% to making sure he is eating.  He also received his second Synigis injection for the month to reduce the impact of RSV.  So much for such a little guy to handle.  I can barely wrap my mind around it let alone him who has to endure it.   Now you can see why it is best I stay home with this little guy.  Doctor Dixon says he will probably be ready in the next few months (March-April) for heart surgery.  As of his latest Dr's visit he weighed 9 lbs. 13 oz. not quite to 10 just yet maybe this week.

Other than that all is well with The Espinoza's.  Nicholas, is making it through his Junior year of High School practicing and getting ready for baseball tryouts and the Varsity season to begin.  We are looking forward to watching him play this spring.  Addison, is making the transition from being the baby to sharing it with her new baby brother.  She loves and handles him with such care (most of the time, sometimes I think she thinks he is her play baby) I have to reminder her.  She enjoys school but really wants Mommy to be going with her everyday.

Please continue to pray for my family and I as we take this Giant Leap of Faith.  It will not be easy but I know it is the BEST choice for Lucas.  We love you all!

P.S.  I had a Tonka Truck Photo shoot with my little guy!  These are just a few of the photos I took.  Got to LOVE Pinterest and there ideas...it definately was not mine!